In North America, eye contact is a form of nonverbal communication that has a large influence on our social behavior. It projects confidence, trustworthiness and competence in any situation.

Your eye contact tells the other person that you are listening, actually makes you a better listener, focuses attention on the individual and makes him or her feel important while you look in control.

Here are a few tips to improve your eye contact:

• Direct eye contact should be made 40-60% of the time. Less than that you are seen as shy, shifty, hiding something or lacking in self-confidence and authority.

• If you sometimes get feedback that you are coming across as critical or negative and you don’t mean to do that, check your eye contact. You may be making eye contact more than 60% of the time and people see this as being pinned down or critical.

• To be a good listener, let your eyes say, “I’m listening” and convey empathy and concern.

• When you are talking, watch your listener’s eyes to see if you are holding his or her attention. It does not matter what you say if the person you are speaking to is not listening.

• Make eye contact and don’t forget to add a smile. It costs nothing yet is worth millions.

Louise, The Etiquette Lady